As home based business owners, you understand there are challenges as well as benefits to this work style arrangement. And one of the biggest challenges my clients face is feeling guilty while they’re working because they’re not with their family, and then feeling guilty when they’re with their family because they’re not working – what a vicious cycle!
Where does guilt come from?
We usually create guilt when we’ve made a choice that offends our values – the things that are most important to us.
For example, it’s 10 AM on a Saturday morning and I’m home with my family. I can choose to spend time with them, or I can choose to check emails, make phone calls, and do other business related activities. Sometimes when I make the decision to check emails, about 5 minutes into it, I’ll start to feel guilty. Sound familiar?
Remember that whenever you say ‘yes’ to anything, you’re saying ‘no’ to something else. Often when we are trying to please others, or trying to get our work done, we’re saying ‘no’ to our highest values. Therefore, the guilt comes.
Guilt is a big issue and it’s very unproductive. So here are 3 tips to avoiding the guilt:
1) Get clear on your purpose for working your business.
The main reason people feel guilty about working their businesses is because they unconsciously feel like it’s taking time away from the things more important to them – hobbies, family, etc.
But if you know your purpose in life, and making money with your business supports that purpose, it will be easier to give yourself permission to invest time into your business.
2) Create a specific schedule that accounts for fulfilling your highest values.
The main reason we actually feel guilt is because on a deeper level, we believe we might not give ourselves the time to spend on more important things. For instance, if you have children, your guilt is usually that you’re spending time away from them INSTEAD of spending time with them.
However, if you have time set aside for playing with your kids, you know that’ll happen, so it’ll be much easier to give yourself permission to work your business now, and play with them later. These are called values-based boundaries and they are extremely healthy and productive.
3) Stick to the schedule!
As simple as this sounds, it’s huge! More important than scheduling the time for your values is actually proving to yourself that you’ll do what you say you’re going to do.
You absolutely MUST stick to your schedule so you’ll believe yourself going forward. If you know you probably won’t keep your commitment, guilt will still plague you. The more you believe your schedule, the easier it will be to keep the boundaries.
By taking these 3 steps, you’ll be following your passion and living your highest value. You’ll also teach your kids something very important. You can’t tell your kids (or anyone else) to live their dreams if you’re not doing it yourself.
