No one likes to be disrespected. But every now and then it happens – we feel like we’re not getting the respect we want or feel we deserve.So what do you do? I see that there are two choices.You can either get down in the dumps about it, or you can dump disrespect.

Here are 10 ways that will work:

  1. Always make respect an internal question first. 
    • If you feel like someone is disrespecting you, it’s likely that it’s starting with you. Make sure you respect yourself. Ask, “What can I do to respect myself better so I am not a victim?”
  2. Be flexible.  
    • Respect is not an all or nothing thing. There are several different definitions of respect, so it’s important to know what yours is – and be flexible with it. Everyone has their own definition, so be open to that.
  3. Re-frame it.
    • Take a look at things from a different perspective. If you think someone not returning your calls is disrespect, imagine all that could be going on to cause that other than disrespect. You have no idea what’s going on in their life that would cause them to forget or fail to call.
  4. Remember that hurt people hurt people.
    • If you get hurt by the disrespect you are feeling, remember that when someone hurts you, they are hurting themselves. Keeping that in mind will lessen the impact of the pain, perhaps even remove it altogether.
  5. Remove ‘shoulds.’
    • If you have strong opinions about what people should do to show you respect, you’re creating expectations. Unless those expectations have been clearly stated to others, you’re setting yourself up for a negative emotional response.
  6. Challenge everything.
    • Question your thoughts, emotions, beliefs and definitions – especially around respect. Questioning or challenging does not mean you have to change them. However, it is important to evaluate if it’s working for you. If it doesn’t serve you, dump it.
  7. Know why.
    • Understand why you do the things you do and make conscious choices. Don’t do something just because that’s the way you’ve always done it. Question why if you do not know and take action based on conscious choice.
  8. Ask “So what?”
    • What happens if you don’t get the respect you want? What’s the worst that could happen? In the grand scheme of things, how bad is it? Chances are it’s not a life or death situation, so don’t treat it as such.
  9. Choose happiness.
    • Simply ask, “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be happy?” You get to pick your battles and arguments. Always ask if it’s worth it.
  10. Let it go.
    • Ultimately you’re the one holding on to any issues that you’re having, and you’ll continue to have those issues until you learn (or choose) to let go.
~ SS